Trump's Riviera of the Middle East

Fancy a holiday to Gaza? You might in 2030

Photo by Sean Oulashin on Unsplash

Picture it now.

A cloud-piercing glass wonder, the sleek reflective facade glowing hues of gold and turquoise reflecting the glittering Mediterranean sea, retracting dazzling beams of fiery orange, deep cyan and majestic magenta as the year round sun slides over the watery horizon to the West. The words Trump Tower emblazoned on the side, reminding the world which President finally brought peace to the long embattled region. This is the Mediterranean resort of Gaza. The Arab Riviera. Once a rubblised wartorn craterous medieval hellhole. Now a pristine coastline boasting the most modern marvels man can make.

Gasps and slack jaws. That was the initial response to Donald Trump's ‘outlandish’ comments about finding a new home for some 1.7 million Gazans to allow America to occupy the 141 square mile strip of real estate and turn it into Dubai-on-the-Med.

But here’s a mad thought. Perhaps Trump's real estate vision for Gaza is actually genius. And just what the region needs following decades of ill-fated two state solution dead-end dialogue leaving the strip forever an ethno-religious political football being played between powerful enemies as old as time.

Using investment from neighbouring Gulf countries - who would all doubtless jump at a slice of the Med - to share the responsibility and the reward of developing the strip in return for temporarily taking in Gazans. He who bids the highest and promises the most gets the primest piece of the pie. When you add to the vision the impressive speeds at which Gulf states built their whopping wonders (the Burj Khalifa went from blue print to building in under 6 years) and the added impetus of competition between states who use skyscrapers as a willy-waving competition, the race to Build Back Best would ignite innovation and creation the likes of which would invite billions in investment and create millions of jobs.

Photo by David Rodrigo on Unsplash

Yes, it does mean some 1.7 million Gazans are temporarily displaced, but as Trump pointed out, their land is pretty much flattened anyway. Employ those in the rebuild with the requisite skills in construction, and meanwhile make any state bidding for a slice of the action accommodate and care for their share of refugees, to be repatriated to their shiny new land as doctors, teachers and restaurateurs by 2030.

As an intermediary measure, postpone Gaza from holding elections and put it under special measures for at least a decade, preventing Hamas from having a hand in anything with access to power, providance ir profit. In the meantime, let the people realise that ditching Kefiyah sporting nutjobs is the best route to prosperity and peace, democratising only once Hamas is a horrific hallucination from history.

Oh the hysterical, hypocritical guffaws of The West who have gone to great lengths to try to democratically block Populism in their own countries while trying to impose it upon states that fundementally do not believe in it.

It's fine to cancel local elections in England to stop Reform from winning seats, but there absolutely must be a ballot for Hamas to rig so that they can ensure terror and tyranny in Gaza! No. Let money talk. When people realise their lives are markedly better without Islamic extremists, prosperity will ensure that peace follows.

Essentially share the spoils between Qatar, Saudi, UAE, Jordan, Egypt and Oman under the arbitration of America, allowing these regional competitors to unite and delight in the one thing they all have in common - sticking one to Iran.

But of course, instead of seizing this positive vision for the future, the lily livered low IQ Leftists reach for the only three words they know how to articulate: Two State Solution.

It's been almost 90 years since this resolution was first proposed. Is that not enough time to realise it’s not going to work? It's basically asking radical Islamists to love the Jews. Good bloody luck with that.

Instead the usual chorus of naysayers have only picked upon whay they almost seemingly hope could go wrong. It will precipitate war. The Gulf states would never agree to it. American troops don't want to be sent to Gaza. It will cost the earth. Where do you send the Gazans? Alongside of course the usual lunatic howls of this somehow equating to ethno-genocide rather than ensuring a better future.

Photo by Ehimetalor Akhere Unuabona on Unsplash

He's just talking like a real estate investor! shouted one. Well, yes. Because he is one. And a very successful one at that. And Gaza right now is basically a massive building site.

The big question should be ‘is this, at heart a good idea?’

Turning a rubblised, craterous, terrorist-filled medieval hell hole into a brand new Gulf resort with peace, beautiful beaches, shiny buildings and jobs for all?

Well, surely the answer is yes. So let's get on and do it.

It will of course require buy in from the neighbours. They will need to offer up Dirhams and Riyals to quickly throw up conference centres, resorts and apartment blocks, as they have in their own countries in dizzyingly fast times.

The development of Dubai, Abu Dhabi, Qatar, Jordan, Oman and now Saudi into hotel-rich, luxury playgrounds from backwards fishing villages mere decades ago has been the most astonishing volte-face of the 21st century. The majority of these glittering desert metropolises have been constructed in the same time it has taken the UK to finish an inquiry into bat populations affected by the yet to exist HS2 rail line. Now section Gaza into 23 square mile plots, each equivalent to one sixtieth of Dubai, and tell me that a full reconstruction couldn't be done by 2030?

The neighbours will also be required to handle the ever present cancer of Islamic extremism, something they have had to do in their own lands in order to create desert Disney World. Woman-stoning Wahhabists have largely been told to take their camel caravans to distant dunes while the Gulf Westernises at an incredible rate. How staggering that this once deeply conservative nebulus of Emirates, Kingdoms and Sheikdoms has become a global hot spot for bikini clad, lip-filled influencers partying on yachts until the call for prayer echoes across a crepuscial silicone vista.

The blight of Iran’s pernicious Shia influence, funding fighters and stoking perma-crisis, would need to be faced down resolutely, something The West would struggle to do alone, but that the UAE and neighbouring states have a degree of success in achieving and an intent on seeing through. Let's not forget these same states let American and Israeli jets use air bases and spaces to intercept Iran's drones and rockets in retaliation for Israel’s bombardment of Lebanon, Syria and Gaza.

Is there an appetite to do this? Without doubt. The Gulf states are all hungrily eyeing strategic coastal footholds on the Mediterranean, opening up the possibility of transiting goods and fuel around the world. They also want regional peace in order that they may thrive off the back of it. How to get there and via which sect of Islam is where the chorus of harmony could begin to fall apart. But money speaks the loudest. With chunks of pristine white sand and sea networks waved in front of them, agreement may come faster than anticipated.

Perhaps the answer, then, is to do just that. Treat Gaza like real estate. America could lead a consortium of Gulf states in developing the strip and making it become a symbol of regional cooperation; a symbol of a future where the battles of the past have been bulldozed.

If anyone can, Trump can.

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